Lying in relationships comes across as an act of betrayal to the receiving spouse. Women — and men too — want their spouses to be like an open book they’d always read. Regardless of how or why they picked up the habit, any form of lying isn’t justifiable.
Hence, it can be quite tricky to understand what are the true reasons your husband lies to you. Furthermore, if you’re a married couple, you each took vows always to love, honor, and trust each other.
But how do you know what to do when your husband lies to you all the time? Let’s uncover all possible secrets, which your husband could hide from your view.
Why Do Husbands Lie About Small Things?
One survey highlighted the issues spouses have lied about to their partner. Ahead of other reasons were topics such as their whereabouts, money, and the children. In 14 out of the 15 responding countries, people lied mostly about their whereabouts. Why? Their motivation allegedly stemmed from the fact it’s the easiest to lie about physical location.
So, we could say husbands lie about small things because they’re “small.” But that can’t be all the truth about it. A survey showed that 11% of male respondents said they lied mostly to their wives. So, a wife may hear little lies repeatedly merely because he’s aware his spouse worries about the “little things” and wants to save her emotions.
For instance, a husband could tell a lie about the moment he’d be home. And he’s doing so to prevent the fears that’d arise from knowing the truth. And then, a man may have learned to be deceptive since they were little. That is, telling lies could have served for self-preservation in their growing years.
Wives whose husbands grew up lying could collaborate with their spouses to get them to stop. However, it’s essential to identify the difference in your spouse. You’d have to decipher whether there’s an affair, or they only need to improve on their character. Regardless of the source of the habit, there are common signs that depict a liar husband.
7 Common Signs of a Liar Husband
Detecting a liar or cheater isn’t rocket science. Even with the cleverest partners — falsehood leaves telltale signs around that give their sources off. You’d only have to be well observant to spot them in a guilty spouse. Let’s look at some of the common signs that can expose a liar husband.
Your Husband Lies About Trivial Things
If your husband lies all the time about seemingly trivial things — don’t ignore it. See it as a wake-up call to become more observant about his activities. If you find him often lying about the little things, what danger could that possibly mean? Well, two things.
One, it might be a sign he’s equally lying about something more important to you. Otherwise, he could lie so often until he does it at every single chance. You sure don’t want either possibility in your relationship. If you find him telling little often, it could be a sign there’s something more serious.
He Avoids Giving Detailed Explanations
Your husband doesn’t seem comfortable offering a proper explanation for their activities. In the process of hiding vital details, the listener could easily fall in between the lies. They’d tag it a mere slip of the tongue, but it’s often a deliberate omission. When you find your spouse hiding vital details often, you may want to look closer.
Your Husband Presents Changing False Versions of the Same Story
Lying in a relationship breeds an atmosphere of distrust in the relationship. A liar husband is difficult to believe — even when they’re telling the truth at the time. One way to detect a liar spouse is to compare their different versions of the same story. A liar’s tales don’t usually agree. Let’s say you asked your spouse about how they spent their last withdrawal from the account.
You guess that they’re telling the wrong story. You’d do well to mark the details of their initial rendition. Later on, ask them indirectly about the same subject and possibly intercept them with probing questions. An untruthful person won’t often remember the emergency answers they gave to random questions.
He Overreacts at Questions
A serial liar often overreacts when questioned for some action they did. They aim to divert your intention in discovering the truth on the subject. If you find your spouse getting angry over the little questions, something’s not right somewhere. Assure them of your sincere intentions for asking and re-tender the same inquiry differently.
Sometimes, rather than overreact, a serial liar sometimes avoids questions by responding with questions. He tactically avoids the problems, throwing the conversation around, and eventually returns your questions. So, whether they’re overreacting or they’re altogether avoiding your question, there’s likely something fishy.
Erratic Body Movement
When people tell lies, their natural body movement gives them away. Regardless of how clever they are, their body tends to show symptoms of being under duress. It’s essential to observe the time of the movement — during or after making a statement. You can look out for these signs from these body movement signs to detect a lie.
- Your husband’s touching their mouth and face uneasily.
- He’s shuffling his feet.
- Your spouse’s biting, rolling or twisting his lips.
- He suddenly gets fidgety with an object he’s holding.
- Your husband’s moving uncomfortably back and forth on the spot and more.
Although these signs are neither exhaustive nor exclusive lying signals, they can help your investigation. Generally, when people are lying, they tend to be uneasy one way or another. So, it’d help to be on the lookout when asking your husband that sensitive question.
It’s a well-known counsel that liars often avoid eye contact when communicating. This sign tends to be quite useful in detecting a lying husband. People who avoid eye contact, especially when they usually don’t, might be hiding something during conversations.
The reverse side of this indicator is that it’s so popular for experienced liars to exploit. Your spouse could deliberately maintain eye contact to divert your gut feeling that they’re lying. The key would be to compare their usual eye contact pattern with what they’re currently showing. Anything far above or below the regular rate is often a red flag.
Keep Their Phones Ever Within Reach
This is one of the most evident signs your husband has something up their sleeves. It’s not surprising; people’s phones reveal much about their activities. Does your husband seem to hold the phone too close, especially when he just returned? Do they change their phone passwords regularly? Any sign of secrecy with their mobile device isn’t a healthy sign.
Mobile phones can give a broad range of information. You could know who they’re chatting with or what they bought online by viewing their device. Financial transactions are also accessible from their phones. Since you aren’t sure what’s wrong, you might want to take steps towards accessing their device. There are different ways to achieve that. We’ll see them in a moment.
How to Deal with a Lying Husband?
Lying is unhealthy for a marital relationship — it doesn’t matter its purpose. We’re here to show you how to deal with a liar husband. You want your spouse as truthful as they can be in every situation. However, having noticed some signs that he’s probably keeping a secret from you, what’d you do? Do you confront him or wait to confirm his truthfulness using other methods? Let’s see different possible approaches to dealing with a lying husband.
- Get Access to His Messaging Apps
Yes, this option is as straightforward as it reads. You can get ample information concerning your husband from their messaging apps. These messaging apps might be social media accounts, email, or SMS messages. If you can access their device, go through their conversations to verify their claims. But what if he isn’t going to let you see his discussions?
- Install a Spy App
Your lying husband might prevent you from accessing their phones or get furious when you ask. The other option is to install a spy app on their device. Used appropriately, a spy app can surely assist you in dealing with a lying spouse. A spy app can remotely help you view all that’s going on in their mobile phone. Within 5 minutes, you can install useful monitoring software like mSpy, and begin your investigations remotely.
- Look Inwards
Many times, your husband is lying because he doesn’t want you upset. Some women wonder about how to deal with a lying spouse while they’re contributing to the challenge. He may under-report a situation to keep you from going ballistic or picking a fight. So, it’d help if you consider your likely reactions when he tells you something awry. If you realize that you’d likely criticize him over the little things, there’s another problem.
- Talk to Your Husband About It
Talk to your husband about the toxicity of lying to your trust and freedom around him. Ask him for his reasons for always lying, even if it concerns trivial things. Meanwhile, remember to assure him that you’re more interested in the truth than arguing with him. Listen to his side of this story and possibly work a way out of his habit. But if you discover something more serious, your approach has to be more serious too.
- Confront Him About Your Discoveries
Significantly when you figure out his having an affair or betraying an agreement, confront him directly. Show him your proof of the bad relationship or actions and how you feel about it. Remember, a spy app can provide you with hard facts as proof for your claims. Secure an appropriate time and place to discuss why your husband lies. And if it appears necessary, you may seek professional counseling together to find a way forward.
How to Fix a Relationship After Lying?
If you’ve been thinking about how to deal with a lying husband, you most likely want solutions. At this point, you’re already certain that they’ve been lying to you over time. So, what’d you do next? You possibly don’t want out of the relationship. What you want is a way out of the lying problem for you and your spouse. The common reason why people lie is to avoid the possible consequences of lying.
If you and your spouse could readily come together to plan a way forward, that’s fine. Otherwise, you may also want to choose between two hard realities. A divorce could well mean much trouble for you and your children. Do you want to have a pretentious husband or know the truth and not want out? Lastly, a marriage counselor can assist in finding a middle-ground for you both.
You may have never thought you’d be asking how to handle a husband who lies. The goal is to hold an honest marital relationship. Many wives are bothered about the consequences of lying to their marriage. Here we look at some of the most common questions that arise around deception in marriage.
What Lying Does to a Marriage?
Being married to a liar creates an atmosphere of doubt and insecurity in a marital relationship. Although the husband might have seemingly good reasons for lying, its effects are detrimental to the marriage.
What Do You Do When Your Husband Is a Compulsive Liar?
The first thing is to decipher his reason for being untruthful to you. Is he doing so because you’d get furious or become moody? You might let him know that you’d rather have the truth than win an argument. He may be having an affair or hiding something equally profound. Privately strategize on how to confront a lying spouse or see a marriage counselor together.
Can a Lying Husband Ever Change?
Yes, your liar husband can become more truthful in your relationship. Have an open discussion with him about the dangers of deception to your marriage and present a workable solution.
Why Does My Husband Lie to Me About Everything?
If you’re asking the question, “Why does my husband lie?” the answer is pretty straightforward. Your husband lies about everything because it’s become a habit for him. He might also be stabbing your back and need to cover his tracks frequently.
What Do You Do When You Catch Your Husband Lying?
What to do when husbands lie is to find a suitable occasion to discuss the habit. If they own up and promise to change, that’s a plus for your marriage. Otherwise, show them proofs you have that they aren’t being truthful and get their reactions. It’d help if you’re patient to hear their side of the story as well.
There’s no justification for a lie in marriage. If you suspect that your husband is untruthful, look out for the above signs. But remember, he might change if you no longer overreact to his little or big errors. For more personalized advice, a marriage counselor could be of help to you and your husband.